I refuse to ignore the lost and forgotten

According to CNN, there are about 3 million mentally handicapped people living in the slums and villages of Kenya. Tonight and tomorrow, Kenya will be featured on CNN's World's Untold Stories. The title of the episode is "Lost and Forgotten" and all about the plight of those who are mentally ill in Kenya.

I was able to watch small clips on CNN's website and my heart and mind was taken away with thoughts of Kenya and my mentally and physically challenged friends there. Just seeing these 2-3 minute excerpts raised within me a sudden urgency to get back to Kenya and start what I am called to do. I know it is to happen in the Lord's timing...so i will wait. However, in this waiting time, my passion and love for the disabled in Kenya grows and grows.

I have been able to walk along side families with special needs and work with special needs kids here in the states. I have heard their struggles and sympathized with their difficulties. The Lord has allowed me to feel a piece of what they feel and has allowed my heart to hurt for them. But just imagine, if the struggles are great for those with challenges here in the states, imagine how those struggles can be multiplied when you live in a 3rd world country.

No one deserves to be thrown away, forgotten, mistreated, abused, neglected, hidden, etc. But this is what is happening to mentally ill and physically disabled in a lot of places throughout the world....even in America this happens. It makes me sick to my stomach. It makes me want to scream! But I know God's hand is upon them. I know God is among those who the world has tossed aside.

I've said it before but it is worth saying again..I have been completely blessed and unconditionally loved by those who are mentally and physically disabled that I am honored to call my friends.

As I think about the future and my missions work, the doubt that I can make a real difference does invade my thoughts at weak moments. But then the Lord reminds me that He did and continues to do big things through individuals who are wholly surrendered to Him. May I continue to die to my flesh and live in Christ.

In closing, I'd like to share some lyrics from a song that has caught my attention recently. The title is "I Refuse" by Josh Wilson. It says "I refuse to sit around wait for someone else to do what God called me to do myself. I could choose not to move but I refuse." And this is true in my life, I refuse to make an excuse and do nothing. I choose to move. I choose to hear the cries of the desperate and needy and make it spur me into action.

Community

We were meant to live in community. We were meant to look after each other, to share each others sorrows and joys, to know each others hearts, to live in unity. The Lord set it up that way for a reason. I believe He knew that we could not do it alone and that love, support, and encouragement were going to be an essential part to our well being and our ability to endure and fulfill the callings He has placed on each of our lives. But it seems that we often miss the mark and that our communities are not as the Lord intended.

This brings me some sadness....knowing that I desire to share my heart but I fear the outcome and knowing that others feel the same way as I do. So instead of seeking out ways to make true community happen, we close ourselves off and live with the belief that we are just being idealistic and this want of love shared and felt within a group of people is an impossibility. Therefore, we press on with this longing but feel paralyzed to do anything about it.

I guess the change needs to begin within ourselves. For instance, I might be the one who needs to set the example of what it looks like to share from my heart about what is going on in my heart. It will involve putting myself out there and putting my heart on the line because I don't know how it will be received. And to be honest, there is a whole bunch of fear that surfaces when I even think about doing this. I think of times I tried to share my heart before hoping it would be received with compassion and care and it was not. This leaves me feeling like I can only test the waters with a person or two before I can even think of diving into the pool.

I don't have a conclusion right now to my musings and I don't know what the Lord will do in me and through me to address this matter. I just know that when I've gotten glimpses of community like that or have even had short periods where I was in community like that...it was good and it was Godly.